Roll Tide: Alabama Got It Right

On this edition of #ThrowbackThursday, we have one of the biggest L’s of the year. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, news and social media has been flooded with stories about Roy Moore’s epic loss on last Tuesday night.

For you less informed folks – Roy Moore (GOP Judge/candidate and likely pedophile) went up against supposed good-guy-lawyer (I hardly ever believe those words in the same sentence) and Democratice candidate, Doug Jones, for the special Senate election.

For months there had been lots of finger-pointing and serious sexual assault accusations against Moore. It felt like victims were literally stepping forward every week and reports of his nefarious behavior was up for display on nearly every media outlet imaginable. Never one to disappoint or stray away from the most asinine and predictable behavior, the good ol’ boys of the GOP continued to sweep allegations under the rug and labeled them as a guise to destroy Christian ethnics and the nuclear family. If you could see my face right now. Moving on…One thing panty-robbing Roy did have going for him was the backing of the White House. He basically had an enthusiastic tangerine prince, a la #45, who spoke praises over his preferred candidate and (per the usual) never failed to take jabs at the media who were actually doing their jobs of reporting news on this creepy crawler and his opponent.

Side Note: I’m really trying hard not to make more jokes or pass too many judgements on this dude but let’s be clear, I think he’s touching on everybody in these streets and I think it’s terrible.

Reality Sunk In

All of the hype came to a crash when Roy received the results late that evening.

Photo courtesy of Chicago Tribune.

Clearly there was shock, disbelief, and a level of “distraughtness” that we hadn’t witnessed by this wasp nest since Obama’s last win.

Moore stood in front of a small audience and attempted to rally the troops by telling his audience “God is always in control.” Why yes He is Roy, yes He is #thankyouGodweneededthisone. Then he had the nerve to rattle off some badly rehearsed excepts from Psalms. It was a complete travesty and a train wreck you you can view here.

Political Gangs

I learned something that night. Honestly, I think I knew it already but found it to be more apparent than ever before. Americans are legit in political gangs. I mean come on, it’s like the Crips & Bloods on steroids and ruining everyone’s lives.

I knew we were doomed when I watched that video floating around showing die hard Republicans hell-bent on ignoring actual facts to vote their affiliation. And yes I’m absolutely sure there are some lunatic “libtards,” as they’re lovingly referred to, out here but I mean right now we’re clearly having some issues with conservative voters and their overbearing/under-applied beliefs. So…I’m literally looking at this video like whoa. These people are real life in a gang and don’t even know it.

Photo courtesy of

This blindly loyal bunch seemed all too familiar to the very thugs most of their pedigree generally try to distance themselves from. In this video, one person goes as far to say that even if the allegations were true, they didn’t want to lose a seat in the Senate. Double blink. What? Y’all already know I think this is not only problematic but just flat out disturbing. What kind of troubled human beings think it’s ok to exchange policies for humanity? Seriously, this gets a big ole WTEFF.

So note to self and to you good people…Don’t be in a political gang – it’s divisive and stupid. Right is right and wrong is wrong. If people are doing wrong, that doesn’t mean support them in their wrongdoings. That means hold them accountable. There are some folks I’ve admired my whole life that are being accused of terrible crimes against women, and guess what…they should be held accountable. I’m not going to give them a pass because they’re a part of groups I align with or because it’s inconvenient for me and doesn’t fit the narrative I’d like to continue to tell about their greatness. NO. They need to be held accountable no matter my personal feelings for them.

That’s called having balance. Try it.

Black Votes Matter

There was something else that we learned that fateful Tuesday night. Black Votes Matter.

Now if you’re conservative and reading this, please try to see past your bitterness and disdain for a group (#BlackLivesMatter) you hardly know anything about to understand my point. Black people are tired and want progress, too. White conservatives are not the only group in America that want to make serious changes, minority voters should not be discredited or disenfranchised. Black Alabamians did not seem to align with anything the GOP was selling and the polls pretty much reflected the divide. People at the top with some good common sense should probably start asking questions like “why is that” to honestly seek real answers around the division between party and race. Obviously those out of touch with the African American community had no clue this one was coming but word on the street was Jones campaigned pretty hard in African American communities and spoke to their growing concerns.

Jones’ win literally came down to race and based off this wild Tuesday night, these 2018 midterms are going to be something to see. I’m just glad Alabama got it right, even if a small minority tipped the scale. <3