So in this week’s stories of women murking the game, we have TV vet Judge Judy Sheindlin who is literally sitting on a gold mine!

She’s in the works of selling her 10,400-show archive back to network giant, CBS, for a whopping $95 million! That’s more money than I could ever fathom but really want to because who wouldn’t want to wish that much money on themselves? Like what do you do with it? Scrooge McDuck it? Buy a boat? Invest in the next big start-up? I don’t know, but this 70-year old diva is in her 21st season and currently makes around $45 million a year helping people realize how dumb they are for trying to “get over” on the law. Anywho, this is such a boss chick move.

But what’s the lesson?

The lesson is to work hard and know your worth! This is a woman who clearly understands her power and her demand.

I used to have such a difficult time with requesting pay for my creative services and now I feel like like as my star rises and my services are requested more frequently, the value of my time also increases. I can’t sell myself short for the sake of playing the nice-girl card. Who said it? Ms. Yoncé, I think it was, told the world “eff you pay me.”

Over the years she’s made incredibly smart, strategic, and very consistent moves with her brand as well as her business. She knows her 10-million viewers like the back of her hand and gives the people what they want – a smart and sassy, no-nonsense incarnation of the law.

She’s been #1 like forever and lives a quiet life with her family. This is the way to do it folks! Invest in yourself, live happily, build your empire quietly and shock the freaggin world without personally announcing a got-dog on thing! Yassss Ms. Judy…Just yasssss.

Give me my money. –#JudyTaughtMe <3

-D.Wright

So if you didn’t know, I’m a music creative and writer who currently works in the technology industry.

I’ve had about 15 years of experience in the music industry, have written stories and songs for as long as I could write and even got a Creative Writing degree to back up my passion of songwriting. It’s different, I know.

Most recently (ok, over the past year) I decided to be a grown up, because it’s never too late to abandon a woman-child mentality. I challenged myself to take advantage of whatever amazing opportunities came my way and came to realize I wanted more. I don’t mean the simple promotion more, which is totes cool, I mean the unfathomable more. I want the, I can’t believe this is my life, how cool is this – more. Now, I have a pretty nice little gig going but I knew that if I really wanted the freedom my heart desired career-wise, I had to give my dreams some new life.

So here it is, advice from a person in transition of making their unfathomable dreams an attainable reality.

Take Matters Into Your Own Hands

You are responsible for your own dreams. No one owes you their love or support when it comes to something you feel passionate about. You will be your biggest cheerleader, supporter, motivator and whatever other -er or -or noun you come up with. Support is a gift, it’s your cherry on top. It’s not a main ingredient and it took me years to honestly realize it. Along with that you can’t wait for other people to help move your forward. You must use every tool and resource you have to push yourself further. Again, this beautiful and amazing thing is YOUR responsibility. Why would a mother immediately let someone bond with her child right after giving birth? Unless some medical hurdles get in the way, it ain’t happening. Your dream is your baby that you nurture and grow. It’s yours to help grow.

Seek Counseling

It’s tough being on a journey solo-dolo and feeling like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. In your times of growth and exploration of your  dream you have to make sure that your mental well being is taken care of. Just as you exercise your body, you want to make sure that your mind-set and emotional state are in tip top shape. Getting in tune with your spirit and your mind is one of the most overlooked and empowering things you could gift yourself. With my spiritual and emotional growth, I’ve really felt a genuine breakthrough. I know I’m finally turning into the best version of myself. I don’t fear anything and I’m ready for the world. Take care of yourself, you won’t regret it.

Never Compare Yourself To Anyone

It’s great to gain inspiration from other amazing people, but your path isn’t their path and your experience will never truly align with theirs. I used to think that I was supposed to be a Disney star before being a pop princess at 18, but guess what…that made no sense. I didn’t even know how to get a tape to Disney and I barely even knew anything about the music business. What I did know was that I was a shy person with lots to learn and a ton of untapped potential. As the years went by, I saw my friends and peers (who I grew up with) in the business become internationally acclaimed creatives, working on TV shows, making tons of money, starting amazing businesses and everything else you could imagine. I began to doubt myself. They looked perfect, acted perfect, sounded perfect, lived perfect and Instagram did not help!

After a mental breakdown or two, I had to pull it together. I realized I’ll never be someone I’m not. I don’t want to even know the things they’ve been through to get what they have and I’d probably never be willing to make the sacrifices they made. I had to learn I’m the expert at my life and that my knowledge, faith, and works will take me where I want to go.

Don’t get me wrong folks, I’m still learning but I feel so powerful now and can’t wait to see what my future holds. How are you giving your dreams new life? <3

-D.Wright

About two weeks ago, Jay-Z released his anticipated 13th album “4:44″ on his music streaming service, Tidal, and the Sprint mobile platform. (And yes, I was one of those people who re-downloaded TIDAL to use the free trial. Don’t judge me…I helped him go platinum.) I listened to this 30 minute hip-hop masterpiece and was immediately enthralled by the arc of his story. Of course the big media tagline seemed to be “Jay-Z cheats on gorgeously fabulous superstar wife, repents, and atones”…but I felt there was more. I knew that writing a thinkpiece out of the burning excitement of it all would be shallow commentary and a waste of your time. So I took a bit to let it marinate and thought of some real takeaways for myself.

Jay-Z Taught Me:

• Never be afraid to evolve
• Allow yourself to think outside of the box financially
• Don’t let anyone condition you to accept their bad behavior
• Never let anything come between you and the people you love

Never be afraid to evolve

[su_quote cite=”Cry Jay Z. We know the pain is real but you can’t heal what you’ve never revealed.”][/su_quote]

Jay-Z with or without the hyphen…With or without the space? Who knows, but it obviously means something to him. We’ve seen this guy bare his soul with slick lyrics over hot beats for decades at this point. He’s gone from a chauvinistic, drug-dealing hustler to a reformed, grown man working to be financially sound and loyal to his family. If you’ve paid any attention to his career you would know he’s always put various versions of himself all out there for the world to see. He’s admitted to dealing (drugs) and not knowing the power of his dollar, sucking at love, mindlessly blowing his money, being the father he wished he had and practically ruining his life for nekkid Virginia (you’ll catch that later). He’s been honest about his humble beginnings from Marcy and his journey to becoming a billionaire. This guy is never afraid to shed old skin, old habits, or old friendships and he continuously reveals his evolution in his work. He shares his growth as an artist, business man and (now) family man throughout his body of work. He takes risks on himself and makes no apologies for it. We should all be unapologetic in our growth and embrace our evolution.

Allow yourself to think outside of the box financially

[su_quote cite=”Financial freedom my only hope. F**** living rich, but dying broke.”][/su_quote]

Many of us have been singing this same song of financial freedom for quite some time now but it was pretty cool to hear an artist of his caliber candidly take on the subject. His no hold barred verses called out colleagues, industry peers, and his fans on the the reckless mentality we’ve held in relation to the dollar. How is it that we’re deciding to monetize our work? How is it that we’re deciding to invest in ourselves and build our communities? How is it that we live rich and die wealthy? “The Story of OJ”, “Caught Their Eyes” and “Legacy” really emphasize the importance of generational wealth and financial empowerment. I’m just now getting to a place in my life where I’m working towards generational wealth. I realized it’s not too late and will continue to invest in myself so that I can make a larger impact in the economy. It’s inspiring to see artists changing the relationship they have with money and helping their fans become more financially literate. It’s high time we start discussing stock options, bonds and other forms of investment.

Don’t let anyone condition you to accept their bad behavior

[su_quote cite=”You egged Solange on, knowing all along all you had to say (is) you was wrong..”][/su_quote]

In Jay’s opening (“Kill Jay Z”), I think Solange taught me this lesson. She obviously takes no crap and I love it. I joke with my friends all the time and say “Solange is the sibling you want in your family.” She’s definitely the opinionated, keep it real type who you don’t want to eff with. I know you should never put your hands on anyone but I really admire her no nonsense, I might just put these paws on you if you act up, attitude.

Mr. Z and Ms. Yoncé have been together for quite some time, and it’s been speculated that he ultimately conditioned his young tender to deal with his bologna. What he probably didn’t realize was that she’d actually snap out of it and had a tribe of ride-or-dies who wouldn’t let it go on for much longer. In the title track, “4:44″, he finally reveals coming to a sobering realization. This is all supposition of course, but ladies you know how we are. A good girlfriend/sister will never let you, or anyone else, make a fool out of you. She got to the point where she played “the fool no more” and I definitely think Solange had something to do with that. Sometimes that’s all we need. Sometimes we need that person closest to us to help us stick up for ourselves. Bad behavior is unacceptable. We have to fight for ourselves and never be blinded by whatever it is to the point where we let people mistreat us. Even if we love them. And if by any chance these bad behaved weasels slip through the cracks, find your Solange.

Never let anything come between you and the people you love

[su_quote cite=”Let me alone Becky.”][/su_quote]

This guy legit rebukes everything that attempts to come between him and his family, and I’m not mad at it. He’s openly going to the mattresses for his village. To me this is deeper than his relationship with Beyoncé – it’s about everyone around him who lifts him up. He doesn’t want to disappoint the people who have helped him become the person he is. He cares about his family honor. He of course references the strength of his wife, the loyalty of his best friend, the courage of his mother coming out, his children…he knows he has a lot to lose if he doesn’t continue to strive for greatness as a man. I think that’s huge.

I stay inside of my head a lot and sometimes forget about the feelings of the people I love. I forget how much they love me and want to see me win. I forget how much I’ve appreciated them during my darkest times but I want to make sure to become more mindful not take any of them for granted. It’s easy to do with this world we live in. We’re all so used to the thought of people being around that we don’t frequently acknowledge how integral they are to who we’ve become. In this new age of digital communication, we don’t connect as genuinely as we used to and we stay distracted with both superficial and self-serving things. It’s time to free ourselves of those diversions (whatever your Becky is) and focus in what’s important – the people you love and the work that brings you fulfillment.

Never let a “Becky” come between you and your true happiness. <3

-D.Wright

From left to right: JJ, Quiana, Ky, Crystal, and Ashley.

I know, I know. You’re probably wondering how quitters could possibly win but I’m here to tell you quitters can indeed win. Quitters can win when they quit the dead end jobs that hold them back from pursuing more fulfilling and financially lucrative livelihoods. At least that’s what business coach Miara Shaw proposed to a room full of super fly and ambitious women on last Saturday.

This is one of those ironic stories because I wasn’t really expecting to go, I already had plans. I didn’t find out about the panel until the week of and if you know anything about Houston and this last weekend, EVERYTHING was going on. I knew that Pride was going to be a big deal and that I had a scholarship banquet to attend, but when I saw the flyer, I knew I needed to be in the room (thanks Ashley)! I had to make it happen however I could. I rushed from my great-aunt’s banquet (even at the protest of my mom), waited 15 minutes on valet while observing colorfully dressed and scantily clad people excitedly heading to the parade, and then zipped over The Star off of Rusk for the big event. It was less than five minutes away from the banquet location and there was complimentary valet. I’m telling you, it was meant to be.

Miara dropping jewels.

The building was beautiful, so I knew I would be in for a treat. I, sadly, was a little late but popped in right while introductions were being made. As I walked through the small audience, I saw bright smiles and fabulous outfits. Everyone was dressed to the nines. I was greeted by a sweet woman in yellow, who turned out to be the Ms. Miara and immediately took my seat.  There sat life coach Quiana Larae, media personality Ky Meyer, (athlete, author, and Ebony/Jet Magazine strategic partnership manager) Crystal Hadnott and  my buddy (founder and president of Medley Inc.) Ashley Small in living color. Mediating was Miara and media personality JJ. It was so cool. I had seen these women working different projects and events all over the city but now had the opportunity to sit in on a super candid conversation about their moves from traditional career paths to entrepreneurship.

They didn’t wast any time either and dug right in. The topics ranged from transitioning from your old job to tips on strategizing your new work flow for entrepreneurial ventures. It was like they were there just to tell me how to run full speed ahead into my new life. They gave in depth perspective on living purposeful lives, branding, confidence boosters and all kinds of other cool topics as well. Everyone felt so familiar and kindred. And when it was close to wrapping up, they encouraged us all to network and to get to know one another. It was a blast. I met so many new faces and got re-acquainted with familiar ones.

The intimate “Quitters Do Win!” panel at The Star.

This panel was definitely the boost I needed to keep my stamina up for this season of my hustle. I’m so glad I was able to attend and I’ll definitely continue to invest in myself by popping in to more meaningful networking events like these.

Is there anything that you are doing to motivate yourself while working at your current job or preparing for a transition into another field? Please share, I’d love to hear all about it! <3

-D. Wright

With all that’s going on in the world, I wanted to offer you guys up a little bit of inspiration. A friend of mine gave me some of the most amazing advice a few weeks back and it’s seriously been changing my life.

[su_quote cite=”Take your work one step at a time. Take life one small step at a time.

-Ameerah”][/su_quote]

Yes… I’ve heard it before (you probably have too), like so many other amazing nuggets of wisdom from family and friends over the years. I guess I honestly wasn’t in the place to apply it to my life. Maybe I only listened and didn’t really hear. I don’t know, but I now realize how much following through on these small useful offerings can impact a life.

I’m learning that when you’re ready to make real progress, good advice will withstand the test of time. Ameerah didn’t know it then, but she was confirming what I needed to hear to get me to the next level. I needed to hear that I didn’t have to build Rome in a day. My success will come with small, daily efforts.

Working on this blog has been a huge undertaking for me. I thought I had to have it up in one night and make money off of it immediately, but it took me about a week or so to get it up and I’m currently working on monetization. With executing at least one task, daily, I’m continuously working on ways to improve my business as well as get it running the way I’d like. I now make sure to never end my day without one task going towards my blog. That could be making small edits, writing out an idea, editing a graphic… it could be anything. I just make sure to have at least one thing done.

I’m also carrying this mentality and discipline into other important aspects of my life. It felt like there weren’t enough hours in the day and used to really struggle at finishing songs or making time to work at my musical pursuits. Now I have a sure-fire plan to get my art done and have projects completed in a more non-stressful way. I’d like to think I’m #teamwinning over here. If I keep this up, who knows where I will be in a year!

So…let’s get real. What about you? What advice can you recall hearing that could get you to your next level? If you can’t think of anything off the bat, take some time to listen. Listen to the folks around you that are wise and have your best interests at heart. Then maybe reflect on some of the advice you might have heard but overlooked.

Now is the best time to make major strides towards your goals. Don’t let the moment pass you by! <3

-D.Wright